This Is How We Do It...

I'll start by sharing my own experiences. FYI: The lighter purple words are links- click on it and you will see what I'm talking about =)

When my son was born, I was told that I need to put Baby Oil or Vaseline on his hair. He only had a tiny amount of hair! He was bald on the top and the sides had not even a quarter of an inch. I chose not to use anything because I wanted to be able to snuggle and kiss my baby's head without getting Vaseline on my lips & face! Also, I didn't see any need for it- his scalp wasn't dry and he didn't have cradle cap or anything at all. His hair looked straight and didn't seem to need a thing. I just washed with baby head-to-toe wash.

Once his hair got longer and had curls, I'd put a little water on the curls if they looked frizzy and it was perfect! Sometimes I'd put a little baby lotion to make the curls last a little longer and it smelled nice. I trimmed his hair here and there if it looked uneven or if it was getting too long and sometimes I put gel in it.

When he was 4 or 5 years old, we took him to get his hair cut (using clippers) and they buzzed it really short! I remember thinking he looked sickly. =( After that, his curls were never the same. His hair continued to grow more and more coarse, and less curly. Today, you can't get his hair to curl one bit! He went through a phase where he wanted to have a fro!

 

He thought it was THE COOLEST THING IN THE WHOLE WORLD and he wanted one!!! So we let his hair grow out for long time and we realized that his hair just isn't made for having a fro! It wasn't curly enough for a curly fro and not straight enough for the classic look. It was a little too fine in some parts and a little wavy in others. I never tried to put any products in his hair- I didn't know of any products other than grease and I knew I didn't want his hair to feel greasy.

 

 After the attempt to have a fro, we allowed him to get a short Mohawk for a while, but for the most part, we keep it cut pretty short. He usually has a nice little fade. I still don't put anything in his hair. I see no need to.

With my 6-yr-old daughter, she was born with a few inches of super soft, jet black hair. It wasn't very curly until after her first year of life. I did the same with her hair as I did with my son- just baby shampoo a few times a week and water + lotion to fix up the curls. When she was about 3, I started using my own super moisturizing shampoo and conditioner and putting friz-ease or similar hair serums in her hair after I washed it and it made it a little easier to style.

Last year, she got lice!!!! That meant an hour or more every morning and evening of picking through her super kinky curls- not fun for either one of us! I got rid of the lice and it came right back THREE TIMES!!! I finally took the advice of another mom with mixed kids and I bought some grease to put in her hair. The rumors are true: Lice do not like oil or greasey environments! The kind I bought was the best-smelling kind I could find and it had Olive Oil in it. I'm not a fan of grease because it stays on everything it touches- clothes, furniture, freshly applied makeup, and my hair- which does NOT look great when it's oily. I used it for about a month and I keep it on hand just in case I need to start using it against lice again.

Over the last few months, I've started using leave-in conditioner in her hair. Suave has some in a gold bottle that I really like! Garnier has some in a green bottle that works well too. It's great for keeping her hair from getting tangled while I'm styling it. And for the mornings, before school, I get her hair a little wet and then use the leave-in conditioner to tame it and re-style easily. I now use the shampoo and conditioners from the Suave Keratin Line for myself and Dessy- it gave me a whole new definition of smooth!!

Just last week, a friend who is bi-racial (I will call her Momma D...I'll post a blog on her coming soon!) told me to use Argan Oil from Sally's Beauty Supply. I'm not sure if this is the best thing for Dessy's hair, but I'm going to give it a try. Momma D believes that if I use it consistently then I will see a major improvement in Destiny's hair within a few weeks. I'll follow up with my conclusion later. I started using it about 2 weeks ago. So far, I think it's okay. I'm not convinced that this is THE ANSWER to her hair needs, but I like it in some ways... like I said, I'm giving it a try.

 

 

Now for BabyD, I recently found this AWESOME baby shampoo made for curly hair! It's Johnson's and it smells so nice and leaves her hair feeling silky! Then I use the Johnson'sleave-in conditioner (smells exactly the same as the shampoo) to brush out her flowing locks... okay, that's an exaggeration... she doesn't have much hair still! There's just enough to get tangled and barely enough to wrap a teeny-tiny rubber band around to make one pig tail at the top of her head, or two even more teeny-tiny piggy tails. It's really adorable FOR THE FULL TEN MINUTES before she removes the rubber bands and then she's left with an unnamed, funky hairdo that reminds me of the fur on a guinea pig.

So, I usually let her hair do whatever it wants to. Once a day, I spray a little water on it to reset the curls, add some more leave-in conditioner. A few times, I have tried Argan Oil on BabyD but I didn't like the way it looked after a few hours. It looked like the oil was still in some areas, closer to her scalp (wet-looking) and not in other places. It looked like she had been sweating heavily.

One thing that I hope to find out more about on this journey is the difference between Curly Hair, Frizzy Hair, and Dry Hair. I have heard more than a few people used those terms interchangeably. To be honest, I got slightly offended when I heard that. First of all, I have curly hair too. Just because the curls are not shining and sticking together to create a perfect curl, does that automatically mean that the hair is dry and damaged? Could it be possible that it's healthy and frizzy? I think so. Most people have different textures of hair on different areas of the head- more fine or course or straight or curly, depending on the area of the head. Has anyone else noticed that with their hair? Please let me know!

 In this case with Momma D, she feels like Dessy's hair is damaged and dry so that is why it is frizzy when she wakes up in the morning or after a full day of school. I just think it's baby hairs. My family always used the term“Baby Hairs” for the shorter hair around the hairline that tend to not lay down with the rest of the hair that is pulled back in a ponytail- most people have this problem whether curly, straight, or somewhere in between. My belief is that those hairs are shorter and they never grow out- not because of damage.

I am not a hairdresser or a scientist or professional in any way, therefore I am open to learning and I might be proved wrong.

We shall see!