I got TOLD!!!

HELLO!!
I had to take a break from this wonderful journey of experimenting everyone's wide range of advice.  But I'm seeing the need to get back on the horse; for my own girls, and for other people on a journey to find out what's best for the mixed hair in their life.

Every time I see someone with pretty curls, I always ask them what products they use. Depending on how much time we have to chat, I try to get the answers to my usual questions as well. In a 3 month time span, I met 4 people that all told me to take my kids to the same stylist/miracle-worker, Kim, at a salon down the road from me.
I took my 7 year old, Dessy, to see Miss Kim, ready to be impressed and of course I planned on learning everything I possibly could from her.
While trimming my daughter's hair, she told me EVERYTHING [she assumed] I was doing wrong. I felt like she was confusing me with the average lazy, white lady who neglects her mixed kids' hair. I bit my tongue through the whole lecture, reminding her throughout that I was very ready to learn from her, very open-minded to anything she was willing to teach me. She ignored my respectful demeanor and willingness to learn. Other customers in the salon were visibly embarrassed for me.
***HOWEVER***
I will share what I learned. .


According to Miss Kim:

Age: Maybe late 40's

Ethnicity: African American

Experience With Mixed Hair: Hair stylist for about 20 years, Has a close friend with mixed kids who are now adults and have "baby soft hair" that she takes full credit for.

How Often Should It Be Washed: 2-3 times a week

What Products Are Best: Shampoo & conditioners with Low sulfates, Products with no alcohol, correct PH balance, Mixed Chicks is acceptable. She said "almost any oil is good", including Argan Oil and Coconut Oil... Miss Kim gave me samples of Shampoo, Conditioners, Hair Milk, and Styling Custard, that I should be using on my daughter's hair

What Products Are Worst: Perms/straightener, gel, mouse, hairsprays, anything for "MY" hair (white people). The leave-in conditioners that I have been using and LOVE are a big NO-NO because they contain alcohol. Anything with alcohol will dry out and shrink up the curls, making it difficult to let hair flow freely and look good.

Any Other Advice: She suggests going in for a trim every 6 weeks. When trimming curly hair, you can't do the upward motion like you do with straight hair. Instead, she says, cut straight across in order to not mess up her "Curl Pattern". That must be a fancy word in stylist language, but I think I get it.

My husband was angry when told him how I was treated and shocked when I said that I am going to take her back to Miss Kim. He said, "Why would you go back there?!"
Because I'm not going to let a rude woman or her opinions of me stand in the way of my own journey to find out the truth about mixed hair. I will continue taking advice, try it out for a while, and come to my own conclusion on what is best for my own kids. I'm sharing my journey with everyone else who might be on a similar journey.